Amazing, but just not for me...

Today I read the amazing story of Felix Baumgartner, and his amazing sky dive from 24 miles in the air.  He broke the sound barrier as he fell, and landed beautifully on his feet.  I would imagine that was quite the exhilarating fall - one he has dreamed of and planned for for a very long time.

I admire his ability to go for and achieve something of that magnitude.  I am awed by his goal to 'reach for the stars' so to speak, in flying that high into our atmosphere, and jump out of the balloon to free-fall, reaching speeds of over 700 miles per hour, as he plummeted toward earth.

And yet - a feat that amazing - is something I would never, even in my wildest moment, have ANY desire to do.  It's just not my thing, you know?

I've been side-tracked in the past in my walk with Christ...seeing things others were doing, achieving, believing, or experiencing.  I've been tempted at times to think - why - why when I am SO IN LOVE with God, do those things not happen for me.  It is distracting, sometimes, to be in the shadow of the glare of a rising star, and not feel that you've been passed over.

But the simple reality of my life is this...God stepped in.  I stepped away, for many years, feeling unloved and believing I was unwanted.  I had my share of moments, as I proclaimed I didn't believe in God, of still crying out to Him and begging to KNOW He was there.  Begging to SEE proof that He cared for me.

In the moment my life fell apart, God was there.  In a big, big way, He showed up and saved what is the most important relationship in my life.  I'm not talking about the one with my husband - that is majorly important as well - but in that moment, God solidified my relationship with HIM.

Since that moment in time, I haven't doubted, for a moment, God's love for me.  I haven't doubted, for a moment, His love, or my adoration.  I love worshiping Him.  I love reading His word.  I love all the little discoveries in every day life.  I love the small, silly answered prayers that show, when I least expect it, that He IS listening.

I hesitate to say, bigger things are not for me.  Sky diving my faith...is not for me.  Living it, every single day, waking up with a song in my heart and praise for God on my lips - THAT is where I live.  That is where *I* am alive.

I understand why some desire bigger things...better things...things that will achieve them NOTICE from others...but none of that has ever been my style.

I adore that still small voice...that undeniable voice of God guiding me through the biggest AND smallest parts of my days...leading me on, and keeping me focused on the one TRUE thing.

My God loves me...my God will lead me where He wants me to be...and until then, I don't need to jump from a balloon at 24 miles high.  (THANK GOD!)

ps...I simply ADORE the words given to my oldest daughter...just randomly around church...as guidance from God...I think, in some ways, hearing His words for her - His guidance for her...it all means even more than anything that is ever meant for me.  Can you just even imagine...God has grand plans for your baby.  Even though she's not a baby anymore....It's just...well....it makes me want to cry! (happily!)