Just pondering...

Do you think it's wrong to not really have a 'bucket list'? I have a cousin, who is in her early 40's, and lives out in California. She's got a gorgeous, glamorous life, and gets to take great trips to Italy, or New York, or somewhere else fabulous for wine and great food, both of which are passions in her life. This year, a friend of hers happened to be friends with the captain of the LA Kings Hockey team. After they won the Stanley Cup, my cousin attended a party wherein she was able to drink champagne from the Stanley Cup. You know, it's not something I would have ever have thought to put on my 'bucket list', but still, a fairly cool think to have done! Last night she added 'danced the night away on a US Battleship', and quipped about what else she should add to her bucket list. And as I sat here, it occurred to me. I don't have a bucket list. There is literally nothing I have a really burning desire to do before I die. Don't get me wrong - I'm not sitting here all maudlin thinking I'm ready to die - not by any means. Although - I guess I could say getting to hold my grandchildren is very much something I want to do before I am gone from this life, your typical bucket list items...I just can't think of any. I think it's a little shameful, when you look at how AMAZING this planet it, to not have any, you know? I don't want to be someone who just exists without ever really LIVING, but for an almost 40-year-old mother of 5, without an abundance of disposable income, what does that bucket list look like? When I compare (ooooohhh...evil comparison!) my life to that of my cousin, sure - she gets to do fabulous things, but she also doesn't have a husband or children. Would she intentionally trade that? I'm not sure. The domestic life just isn't one that ever fell into place for her. When I look at my life in relation to that of our speaker at church today - someone who has built churches in a very hostile part of the world for more than half my lifetime, I think....what a bucket list. What a life LIVED...right? So I'm going to be giving this some thought. Zack and I had contemplated, on one of our dates not long ago, where we wanted to be in 5-10 years. But really, it was a fruitless discussion, because I just hadn't really considered it. Today, however...I want to really put some thought into it. I want to really think about what is on MY bucket list. We shall see!